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Wednesday, 11 May 2011

So I just realized this Lastnight

Last night my daughter and I had an argument after she threw a bit of a fit when asked to do something. I wanted to know why she was acting this way what thought she had while throwing the fit. I was asking her if she was mad at me.
Let me back track here a bit.
I came from an abusive home my father, typical to to some strict religious followers (the whole spare the rod crowd), firmly believed in capital punishment, and then some. He totally controlled our (my brother and I) lives and was very hard on us. One time, for example, when I was about 8, I received a spanking that was so severe it bruised my kidneys and caused me to have blood in my urine. So I was determined NOT to do this to my children.
Well unfortunately, I didn't know how to be any different really, so when my daughter was born I spanked lightly at first, but as she got older, my punishments got a little more severe, and one day I went to spank her and realized I hit her ENTIRELY to hard. that was the LAST time I spanked her. but unfortunately it caused her to be a little frightened of me AND caused her to have some resentment toward me. We are in counseling for this so she can deal with it, and I have FULL out apologized to her and trying to make up for it.
So here we are and we come to the fit she threw. I wanted to know why and asked her if she was mad at me and thus acting out. She couldn't answer. In the course of the conversation I was letting her know that she has something I dont have. the person who abused her willing to make up for it and fix things. I am taking responsibility for doing what I did and she can have peace. I can't because my father is dead.
See, I confronted my dad and he NEVER saw the wrong in it. But even worse came the realization.
On July 14th 2009, my father killed himself, two years earlier on July 21st 2007, my mom died of Pancreatic cancer, and he could never adjust to being without her. BUT on top of that the support mechanism of family was broken to some degree. OH sure my brother worked tirelessly to talk to dad everyday. The relationship between my father and I, however, remained severly strained. In his suicide note he said flat out:
"I don't understand why Stephen is not son he should be, why he hates me so much. You be careful with him he will fight you for this"
At the end there he left everything to my brother and expected me to fight for possession of his things. This is linked to an earlier argument between my father and I after mom died. He thought I was wanting some of her possessions which was a complete misunderstanding on his part. I wanted nothing from them of her stuff OR his.
But what I Realized last night was the first part. My father actually blamed me for not being there for him and as such PART of the reason he killed himself. Holy shit, He blamed ME!!!!
I know flat out it was NOT my fault we could never get peace between us. But it has left two major issues.
1. OF course I will never have closure to my issues with my father
2. My brother blames me too.
I know My brother blames me as he has done almost nothing to keep in contact with me since dads death. I call him most of the time to initiate the conversation. our relationship, however, remains strained to this day. But I hadn't known it, not for sure, until last night. I tried calling my brother today but so far no reply. I wonder if it will ever be fixed with us.

Monday, 09 May 2011

I am a Terrible Writer

Seriously I am. I convey thought much more clearer verbally and tend to be better at it. So my partner and many other have told me. I really suck at writing but I do it anyway. I have been reading blogs of several people I follow and it makes the point even clearer.

First I am not very good at putting together my thought in written form. I tend to jump around or make statements without much clarity. I tend also when writing to make blanket statements without thinking about it, which my partner, Kris, tends to edit for me or catch later.

The next thing about others bloggers I have noticed is Proliferation. Seriously, they are prolific in their writings. I tend to think long and hard about something I am writing before writing it and usually takes me all day to write something, and it is usually long at that point too. So in many ways I feel inadequate in my writings to others.

I have thought about Video Blogging but Kris is really against it for some reason, I haven't talked to her about it, but the time I did mention it to her in the past she was instantly negative about it.

Well this is more of a journal entry than it is a blog but what ever... If you have read my stuff before or have input please feel free to tell me what you think.

Sunday, 01 May 2011

Osama Bin Laden is Dead... So what?

Yeah so people are cheering "YAY OSAMA IS DEAD"

Really? Cheering? I am a pacifist and don't wish ill or Death on anyone and yeah he diserved it on some level but really Cheering for someones death?

And what did it get us?

Trillions of dollars spent on a war to get him and a war that will STILL go on long after his death. So nothing there. A Martyr For the extremist Muslim, which we sure don't need more of those. this will incite more reactions from them for sure. So what did it get us?

REVENGE for all those killed by his masterful plan...
REVENGE for daring to attack the most POWERFUL nation in the world...
REVENGE for All those grieving families who have lost sons/husbands and daughters/wives in a war trying to find him...
REVENGE for the Christian who totally believe this is a war against their god...

What did we really get?

Absolutely NOTHING, except more pissed off extremists at us... It sure as hell isn't a "Major Military Victory" as I heard one fellow say, it isn't a victory of any sort really. It would have been so much better to catch him alive and try him in court. But no we had to kill him... though I am sure the situation warranted it...

I find it more depressing the numbers of people I have seen Proudly announcing OSAMA IS DEAD. and the hate for him and lack of care for the waste of life... I think this is more reflective of attitude in our country and it is sickening to me.

Do you remember when 9/11 happened and there was dancing in the streets at the "successful attack of Americans on American soil"... How Disgusted were you by that? and yet here we are dancing in the streets of the death of that mastermind behind those attacks.

Sunday, 24 April 2011

Pagan Origins of Easter
Many, perhaps most, Pagan religions in the Mediterranean area had a major seasonal day of religious celebration at or following the Spring Equinox. Cybele, the Phrygian fertility goddess, had a consort, Attis, who was believed to have been born via a virgin birth. Attis was believed to have died and been resurrected each year during the period MAR-22 to MAR-25.

Gerald L. Berry, author of "Religions of the World," wrote:

"About 200 B.C. mystery cults began to appear in Rome just as they had earlier in Greece. Most notable was the Cybele cult centered on Vatican hill ...Associated with the Cybele cult was that of her lover, Attis (the older Tammuz, Osiris, Dionysus, or Orpheus under a new name). He was a god of ever-reviving vegetation. Born of a virgin, he died and was reborn annually. The festival began as a day of blood on Black Friday and culminated after three days in a day of rejoicing over the resurrection." ₃

Wherever Christian worship of Jesus and Pagan worship of Attis were active in the same geographical area in ancient times, Christians:

"... used to celebrate the death and resurrection of Jesus on the same date; and pagans and Christians used to quarrel bitterly about which of their gods was the true prototype and which the imitation."

Many religious historians and liberal theologians believe that the death and resurrection legends were first associated with Attis, many centuries before the birth of Jesus. They were simply grafted onto stories of Jesus' life in order to make Christian theology more acceptable to Pagans. Others suggest that many of the events in Jesus' life that were recorded in the gospels were lifted from the life of Krishna, the second person of the Hindu Trinity. Ancient Christians had an alternative explanation; they claimed that Satan had created counterfeit deities in advance of the coming of Christ in order to confuse humanity. ₄ Modern-day Christians generally regard the Attis legend as being a Pagan myth of little value with no connection to Jesus. They regard Jesus' death and resurrection account as being true, and unrelated to the earlier tradition.

Wiccans and other modern-day Neopagans continue to celebrate the Spring Equinox as one of their 8 yearly Sabbats (holy days of celebration). Near the Mediterranean, this is a time of sprouting of the summer's crop; farther north, it is the time for seeding. Their rituals at the Spring Equinox are related primarily to the fertility of the crops and to the balance of the day and night times. In those places where Wiccans can safely celebrate the Sabbat out of doors without threat of religious persecution, they often incorporate a bonfire into their rituals, jumping over the dying embers is believed to assure fertility of people and crops.

References used in the above essay:
1. Larry Boemler "Asherah and Easter," Biblical Archaeology Review, Vol. 18, Number 3, 1992-May/June reprinted at: http://www.worldmissions.org/Clipper/Holidays/EasterAndAsherah.htm
2. Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod Q & A Set 15, "Why do we celebrate a festival called Easter?" at: http://www.wels.net/sab/text/qa/qa15.html
3. Gerald L. Berry, "Religions of the World," Barns & Noble, (1956).
4. J Farrar & S. Farrar, "Eight Sabbats for Witches," Phoenix, Custer, WA, (1988).
5. "Sunna," TeenWitch at: http://www.teenwitch.com
6. "Dies Solis and other Latin Names for the Days of the Week," Logo Files, at:
  http://www.logofiles.com/
7. "Sunday Observance," Latin Mass News, at: http://www.unavoceca.org/
This is TOTALLY STOLEN FROM:
http://www.religioustolerance.org/easter1.htm

So let's be appropriate shall we:
Happy Spring Equinox Celebration Day Everyone

Friday, 22 April 2011

Atheism is only attacking Chrisianity... REALLY?

Recently I posted a reply on a blog to Chibi Son of Goku about how it appears that Atheists are only attacking christianity. here what he said Exactly with my reply inserted:

Chibi said: "I still haven't heard why atheists don't speak out against Muslims, who brand and mame people for not following the rules imposed by the Quran."
I replied:"Atheism speaks out against ALL religions See Richard dawkins in the BBC documentary "Root of All Evil"... What you tend to hear however are atheists here at home whom are more familiar with? YEP Christianity... thus they center there discussions on it, though in general they mean all religions."
Chibi Continued: "The most preposterous thing I've heard is how religion is forced upon people in science classes in public schools. From what I heard, the situation is the exact opposite."
I replied: "Then you aren't paying attention there are stories and lawsuits going at various times throughout the country for this exact premise. You need to look around and quite playing the "we are so persecuted card" or at least, that's what it appears you are doing here."

This of course being a Low Born post, she/he had to make a statement

@Volizden - Saying that atheists have the same concern for religions other than Christianity is lip service.
Atheism was developed in Europe specifically to destroy Christianity.
And Xanga atheists NEVER write blogs against iSLAM.
If some wacko preacher in Florida with 26 followers burns a Koran and Muslims in Pakistan riot, atheists invariably blame the preacher and all of Christianity and every single Christian.

Let me tear this apart. Allow me to rebut LoBorn.

So Loborn said: "Saying that atheists have the same concern for religions other than Christianity is lip service."

This is completely untrue. I as an atheist, and so far EVERY atheist I know, equate islam with christian, jewish, hindu, and generally all other faiths, even that of my hereditary (American Indian) spiritual religion of tribal beliefs. ALL are ridiculous and primitive, in thinking there is a god and/or spirits and you can communicate with it/them. That these entities have a direct affect on our lives. ITS ALL GARBAGE since there have been Scientists trying to prove the existence of such things for as long as science has existed. and so far NOTHING, no proof for metaphysical ANYTHING.

Again I point out Richard Dawkins BBC Documentary "Root of all Evil" as an excellent example. It just appears, that here in the US, that many atheist are "attacking christianity" because?

Wait for it...

We live in a country dominated by christians AND THUS, as such, it is the one religion we are MOST familiar with. So go figure it is the top religion to be referred too by American atheists.

Loborn next said: "Atheism was developed in Europe specifically to destroy Christianity."
This is a bullshit claim, reaching for anything to prove loborn's persecutiuon complex, I can show you atheists who are Tribal, who are Middle eastern (from jewish, muslim, and hindu countries), I can show you atheists from every belief system in the world... WHY?
Because as long as there has been belief without proof, there has been a skeptic who says: "Wait a damn minute" or something like that. Thus and ATHEIST AKA a Non believer in god or gods.
Loborn goes on: "And Xanga atheists NEVER write blogs against iSLAM."
This I can say without a doubt is a flat out lie. Loborn Follows Zerowing21's blogs... Or used to, and I know for a FACT he has written about the extremes of the muslim faith several times. So loborn again is full of sheyet. Obviously most of us knew this.
The lobrow intelligence continues: "If some wacko preacher in Florida with 26 followers burns a Koran and Muslims in Pakistan riot, atheists invariably blame the preacher and all of Christianity and every single Christian."
Well Duh, why? First of all, it is, flat out, a Taunting insult by said religious group of "not True Christian™" Christians at another religion. KNOWING, flat out, the extremist of that religion, have KILLED people for drawing cartoons of Muhammad. It isn't a reaching stretch of logic to go through for this next part. If drawing a cartoon is inflammatory, just imagine burning their sacred book is like comparison. Whoa. Loborn even reinforced this by stating "and muslims in Pakistan riot"
Next, Christianity has claimed for centuries that is is a faith of love and compassion... Where is the love and compassion in the burning of the sacred texts of another's faith? the short answer? NONE. there is no love or compassion there is only hate and disdain, plain and simple. This just proves what atheism has said about religion and ultimately all religions all along, there is NO respect for anything outside of their "faith".
So with these two points alone, who is at fault for fanning the extremist muslim in Pakistan into rioting?
1. The Christian Preacher for Burning the Books
2. all of chrisitanity for a history of intolerance and just reinforcing that history by burning and allowing the burning of this other religions sacred texts.
3. every single christian for allowing it to happen with out censuring the preacher, without stopping it from occurring.
How hard would it have been for a coalition of christians to get together and for a human wall between the preacher with the Korans and the bonfire? Wait actually DO SOMETHING, you mean get off their knees in prayer and actually go intervene? Apparently pretty damn hard to do indeed.
And WHO has to pay for this in the end... NOT just the christians... ANY American believer and non believer is a target for the extremists for this and other "crimes" against islam.

Loborn is an example of the "christian" that clearly shows through the "extreme element" of Christianity. and by the LACK of action by moderates your reinforce to the atheist how you are passive and even conspirators in the intolerance of the faith. YOU took part in the burning by allowing it to happen by not standing up and stopping it. this is the crime of christians shared ONE AND ALL....